Reciprocal Disrespect

 The fact that I respect you doesn't mean you should disrespect me.

Janus-Faced Politicians And The Rest Of Us

 ‘Tis the season of cross carpeting, when politicians migrate from the opposition PDP party to the ruling APC party.

The average Nigerian politician is an embodiment of these two major political parties. He has long asserted his right to move freely between the two. Thus, he feels at home in either; and his motives are beyond reproach.

Which means, he could represent PDP to me and at the same time represent APC to you ‘behind my back’ with the eventuality of setting us on a collision course.

Obey-The-Wind-TV

 Obey-the-wind-TV

Those who grew up in Lagos in the 50s and 60s should remember a type of inferior fabric for trousers called “Obey the wind”  or “ota Marina “ (i.e, not Marina Quayside friendly).  As a young man, if you wore trousers that were not made of quality fabric like Terylene (Dacron) or pure 100% wool that could stand the test of time, you were challenged by your mates to show up in them in Marina Quayside “catwalk “. If your trousers billowed and fluttered excessively in the Marina breeze, then they were declared inferior and you along with it.

In the same 50s and 60s, you could count on the fingers of one hand how many families owned TV sets. In those days, the ceremony of sparking the TV to life every night is akin to igniting the Olympic torch several months before the event and relaying it over thousands of miles to hundreds of places around the world before ending up on the day of the ceremony at the cauldron where the final bearer uses the torch to start the flame in the arena. Yes, that was about how long you had to wait for the TV to warm up. That was the best technology could offer then.

Nowadays, with advanced technology, nobody has to go through that tortuous route to switch on the TV, …errr….except in Nigeria!  For instance, if you switch on the DSTV, you can go and make a cup of tea and come back and still wait a few minutes before the scanning comes to an end and you are allowed to watch TV. And if it rains or it is windy, you can go and do something else because DSTV is bound to hold services in abeyance until the rainstorm subsides. That’s what you get with obsolete technology. That’s what we are getting now. You make monthly payments for services that should be pay-as-you-go. Shame!

Sadly, eleven years after this cartoon, nothing has really changed. Oh, except the cost of your monthly subscription. The package you paid N4,800 for then, is N19,000 today!